Sunday, May 15, 2011

Go the F*ck to Sleep

It's genius really. Adam Mansbach is the Cee Lo Green of parenthood with his new book, Go The F*ck to Sleep.  I'm so upset I didn't write it myself.  I defy you to find a parent who hasn't thought it and those of you I know and love, you've all said it.  But believe me, I respect you just as much if it was only a silent mantra.

It gives rise to so many other titles:
Clean Your F*cking Room!, Brush You F*cking Teeth (courtesy of Mary Pols), Run, Your Going to Miss the F*cking Bus, and of course, Shut the F*uck Up, For Just One Minute, Please.

Before I had children, I used to judge those women in the grocery store who ignored their children sitting in the carriage chattering away.  I thought, oh you can do better.  I will definitely do better. Now I have four children, who all talk at the same time, vying for my attention like a pack of puppies. One takes a deep breath when he wakes and does not stop talking until he closes his eyes at night.  Each day I'm thrilled by my children's vocabulary, wit and perseverance.  But for the times that I have no answers or don't give a rat's ass about Pokemon, Star Wars, Halo, or the Friday, Friday song maybe there should be a book out there to remind me, I'm not alone.

Comment with your own titles, maybe we can start our own series.


  1. Oh, Sarah... thank you SOOOO much for posting this!! I'm deliriously sleep deprived after waking both mornings this weekend long before dawn and driving hundreds of miles to sit in the rain and hot sun on soccer fields. I'm winding down with a glass (OK... a really BIG one) of wine and checking emails and facebook.

    I'm still laughing with big tears running down my face -- this is too funny and too true. I'm sharing with every parent I know -- well except for the ones who would turn to stone if they hear the "f" word. I'm still in the Bible belt!

  2. You are soooo not alone! Said it? OMGGGGGGGG. I LOVE finding out who of my perfect mother friends ain't so perfect!

  3. Laughing and laughing. It's great to love our kids to pieces and share these moments anyway.

    How about:
    -"You did SO Bite Her, You Little A**hole!"
    -"I Don't F*cking Care Whose Fault It Is!"

    As an adoptive parent, I'd like to add a book for my own niche market:
    -"I SO Wish I Could Mail You Back Where You Came From"

    (Um, for anyone appalled reading this last one--I really do intend to keep my kids)